Do you ever feel guilty for having a bad day? Or you just need to hide from your kids in the bathroom for 5 minutes? When you have to step away so you don't spank them out of anger? When you raise your voice to them?
I am usually a very happy person and I really do enjoy parenting and I absolutely feel blessed to have my life. But I do have those moments. And I feel bad when I do. I feel like I shouldn't ever have them because then I don't appreciate my life.
My children are absolutely amazing. Such great girls. But having 2 is harder than 1. Just yesterday I thought it'd be fun to take them to the library. Then Kai had to go potty and Brayce kept crawling on the bathroom floor - yuck! I needed 4 hands. When it was time to go Kai was not ready and was not listening to me. She is at the age where she likes to push the limits a bit. I thought about just dragging her out kicking and screaming. I talked to her and then said we are going. It was stressful and I had to look around to see what eyes were watching me and what they were thinking about me - what kind of mother I was.
Kids are always going to have their moments. I try to do my best. I make my girls listen to me but fits will happen and will happen in public. And it's ok. We are still good mothers.
I read a blog post this morning about a lady's thoughts on carpe diem. When I first read it I was like wow shes negative I do love parenting every moment. Then I kept reading and got real w myself. There are some moments that aren't good and I want a break. I'd like to be able to go the restroom w out 2 lil girls staring at me. Or get through a shower without being yelled to come help w something.
But even with the hard moments, I do love everyday - even the days that I wish bedtime would come a little earlier. I wouldn't change my life for someone else's and I absolutely love my 2 girls. They are stinking great!
So I think it's going to help me be a better mom. To be able to be honest with myself and my husband when I didn't have a good day or when I need to take a drive around the block by myself. None of that makes me a bad mother.
Being a mom has its hard times but has soooo many joys.
Plus a hug or a kiss from my girls and when they fall asleep in my arms I feel as though I'm holding a piece of heaven.
Last night it was just me and the girls at home and I looked around and the house was a mess and dishes needed put away. I had an ah-ha moment. It's ok for life to be a mess sometimes. I played and played w the girls and had some laughs and then cleaned the house before daddy got home and smiled.
So mommas out there give yourself a pat on the back for a job well done and then sometimes just for a job done.