Is It Worth It?

Last night I was filling out my Simplified Planner with all our to-dos and the things we have coming up when I remembered that our library has a story time on Tuesday mornings. We haven't been in probably a year, so I decided we would go. I planned to get there 30 minutes before it started to give the kids time to play and check out some books and be back home in time for lunch with Jonathan. Well, instead of being 30 minutes early we were 10 minutes late. We quietly snuck into the room and sat in the back. 

Being late used to never bother me and I just succumbed to the fact that I was always late. Then during my struggle with depression these past 2 years, I wasn't late or early, I just never went anywhere. We stayed home a lot. I am an introvert and a homebody so I don't really like to go, go, go. Add in living with depression and well, there were many weeks I didn't even leave my house at all (besides for church on Sunday morning or to drive around by myself.) 

I'm now trying to put in the effort to go places where I think the kids and myself would enjoy and places for learning opportunities. But after today I have to ask myself, is it worth it? Is it worth the effort? Is it worth the energy? Wouldn't it be easier to stay home? I'm only one person and they are 4. 

It can be exhausting. Right mamas? 

But it can also be very rewarding. My kids got to participate in a story time with other kids, play, listen to books and have fun. I got to chat with a friend and sip on some coffee. 

So while it can be exhausting to venture out with my 4 young kids by myself, I am excited to admit that it is worth it. 

When struggling with depression, I barely had energy to get out of bed in the morning. It's very exciting to me to be able to say I once again enjoy going places with my kids. I wasn't stressed and yelling at them. We got to go at our own pace and my big girls were very helpful. Sure, we were late. (We are a work in progress.) But we went. 

I'm looking forward to all of our adventures that lie ahead of us!