Today I prayed a prayer. A prayer I've prayed before and a prayer that has always been scary to me.
It was a prayer for conviction. I am asking that the Lord convict me and give me the strength to change.
I just finished reading Set-Apart Motherhood by Leslie Ludy (which I 100% recommend to mothers out there.) A question she asked in one of her last chapters got me thinking. "Am I exhibiting the honorable behavior that I desire to see cultivated in my children? Are there areas in which God is asking me to replace selfish or sloppy habits with honorable ones?"
Yes, it's me again. Talking about health and being overweight. This has been going on for years. A few years ago I thought I had conquered it, but alas I had not. Just because I lost 80 pounds and got to my goal weight and I was regularly exercising does not mean I conquered anything because shortly after I gained it all back and resorted back to all my unhealthy habits.
Now I'm ready for some permanent changes. Not just ones that focus on my pant size, but first letting God change me from the inside out.
Health, or I guess I should say the lack of, has really effected who I am and what I do. I am a Christ follower that (tries to) hide in the background due to insecurities. Also, I am the bride to my husband of (almost) 8 years and my weight effects many areas of our married lives. I am a mother to 3 little ones and 29 weeks pregnant with my 4th. I am in the waiting period of getting approved to be a foster mom to a couple more little ones, which could mean I would have 6 children under the age of 6. Hello! That is going to take some serious energy and strength -- which I lack both!
I am a lazy, overweight, bump on a log. But how do I change? I feel like I'm somewhat of a lost cause because I've let myself go so much that it's pointless - plus I'm pregnant so isn't this my time to have an excuse and do whatever I want since I'm going to get fat anyways?! (That thought is what got me into a lot of this trouble! I was at a healthy weight with energy before getting pregnant with my now 14 month old son. During his pregnancy, I gained 60 pounds and only lost 10 of it before getting pregnant with #4.) But this is so not true! It's not pointless and now is the perfect time to take steps to change that.
I want to be able to give my best to my husband, to my family and to others. I can not do that with being so overweight and out of shape that I have no energy and am lazy. I want to be a servant. I want to serve my family and lead them to choose healthy lifestyles (I must model this!). I want to mother a bus load of young kiddos with excellence, love, patience, etc. And yes, not being stuck in choosing 1 out of my 3 items of stretchy clothes that are still too tight will be a nice change.
But how? ALL of my habits suck. I stay up too late, sleep in, lounge on the couch all day, eat sugar, sugar, sugar and umm... I may have a ️coke icee problem.
First things first: (Thanks Leslie!): ASK GOD. I am asking God for the grace, strength, & wisdom to make one change at a time. I'm going to wait until one habit is fully established before I try to incorporate another one. I am going to start small. One day at a time. - Yes, that sounds like it will take forever with slow progress. But health is a marathon not a sprint. I've tried the sprint time after time, year after year. This time I want something that lasts. And with being in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy I think it's a great time to take it slow, but to start moving!
My first step: BYE BYE ️COKE ICEES!
I'm going to be praying this week for what my 2nd step should be. Wish me luck, cheer me on, and follow along.
What habits and steps have helped you move from junk food junkie/lazy bones to health?!?