The man on the phone told me that certification to become a licensed foster care family would take 3 to 6 months.
That in itself seems a little crazy. I am also pregnant with my 4th child and am due in 4 months. So essentially our family could be growing double in just a few short months. A newborn and a foster child or two. Might we be a little crazy? Yes, I think so. But honestly, that is exactly what we want to be for Christ. We want to be a family that has a crazy love for God and for others. I mean we want to want to.
Comfort and safety is such a... well a safe and comfortable place to be.
But my husband and I have recently had our eyes and hearts opened and asked by the Holy Spirit this question, "if you were unbelievers would your lives look any different than they do now?"
Obviously, my husband would be fired from his job if he was an unbeliever since he's a pastor, but other than that would our lives look differently? Or would we just be a good, normal American family?
Please don't hear me wrong, I don't think everyone's journey has to look a like to be right. I'm actually glad they don't!! God calls us to different things. But He does call us all to love Him and love others. There are so many ways to love! And for my family we have been led to this life: a big family, homeschooling, and foster care/adoption. What does it look like for your family?
But honestly I have so many fears and questions. Can we do this? Is now the time? Will this negatively affect my biological children? Do we have the space for it? Will this work out? Will we get into this and realize we can't handle it? Do I have the strength to mother 5+ children?
The answer is No. No, we can't do it. No, I don't have the strength. But I am choosing to rely on God to give me all the strength I need. I know with Him we are able. I know it won't be easy. But it will be worth it.
Romans 5:3-4 "We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation."
So today I nervously leave behind comfort and safety and take a hesitant, but giant leap onto the road of faith.
We may not be perfect. But we are willing.