Aug 12, 2013

I Don't Want to Share

Lately, I have turned more into a private person. I've been apprehensive to open up and share my life on Facebook, my blog, and even people in real life. I'm not exactly sure why. I love blogging and most people know I like Facebook. But the past couple of months my status updates have been very limited and my blogs have been few and far between. Blogging is a fun outlet to share your thoughts with your family and friends and people you barely know or even strangers. But it is also a very scary thing to put yourself out there and I am always questioning myself of why I share what I share.

What I want from my blog and social media and even more importanty, my life, is to point towards Jesus. Everything I do I want it to be because of Him and for Him. I want to encourage others. I want my experiences and life lessons to be an example of what life is like when Jesus is the center. I want people, my readers, to be able to use my experiences and mistakes/struggles as a way of encouragement in their own lives. When I was going through the toughest thing I have ever had to experience in my life; I was able to better handle it because I had previously read a friend's blog about how she made it through the same situation and how she clung to Jesus through it. She was so open and shared her personal thoughts and heartbreak - I know she must've been so frightened to do so - and because of it I was able to use her story as an encouragement and some strength in my own life. I want that for my blog and my readers.

One of the main ways that people who know me would describe me is: honest. I am open, real, and honest. I tell it like it is, but do usually try to be sensitive of who I am talking to. But I will not tell you I like your haircut if I think it looks like you used a weedwhacker to cut it. I don't brown nose and you will know if you have made me upset or hurt my feelings. I can't help but share what I am thinking when I feel strongly about something. So I want you to know when I blog I try to always share the good, the bad, and the ugly. Which is what makes it so hard to open up and share sometimes. I don't want to just paint this beautiful picture for the outside world to see and pretend I am perfect and I have it all together. Because believe me - I am not and do not.

With social media, like Facebook, we can put our best foot forward. We get to share all the pretty things with the world. We get to be whoever we want to be. Our kids get to be the best, smartest, and funniest and we get to be superparents who have no flaws. We get to pick and choose what people see and know. We get to be the Pinterest person we all dream of being.

I guess I just want to make sure that I am always being myself. But I don't just want to share my personal life with you so you can be nosey and know what's going on with me. Honestly, sometimes I don't want to share anything with you. But yet, blogging is constantly on my mind. I love it. I feel as though it is something that God wants me to do - so how can I ignore that? I just always have that struggle of WHY am I sharing. I really do want to honor and glorify God through my posts and my life. I just think we can learn so much from each other. If we are willing to live in community with each other we can love each other, support each other, help each other, encourage one another, and pray for each other. We can know we aren't alone in the struggles we go through. Someone has been there and made it through. Someone is going through it at the same time you are and understands you. We can admit to one another that we are not perfect and we make mistakes. We can admit that we are sinners who need forgiveness.

So, I want to thank each of you, whoever you are, that takes the time to read my blog posts. I hope I have accomplished a little bit of what I wrote about above for you in your life. I apologize for not being as consistent with my posts, I know that makes it hard to follow. I do not take blogging lightly, I appreciate your time to read my thoughts and posts and to be a part of my family's life. And speaking of that, I appreciate my husband for being my biggest supporter and not only letting me, but encouraging me to post about our life, our marriage, and our kids.



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